– I love to give alms to people and it comes naturally. I want to help others, but my husband is not happy about this. I do this secretly and he reproaches me… Giving alms to people makes me fly and my soul becomes joyful. Am I doing the right thing?
– Be merciful to both people and your husband. Do not upset him. Choose “the golden mean.”
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
What should I do?
What have I got?
How should I fall in love with God?
To love Him with my soul and heart,
And never-ever fall apart.
Just like our Saint Philaret,
You, please, unveil this secret.
– Lovesickness passes away quickly, but true love comes with long-term effort and stability. This concerns both earthly and spiritual life. One should distinguish lovesickness from love. Lovesickness for God may come easily and easily disappear, while love is achieved through suffering in spiritual life.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– Unfortunately, before coming to faith, I acquired sinful habits through a long-term disgraceful life. After coming to faith, I began to resist them, but I fall into sin all the time. May I, being a sinner who constantly falls into the sins of the flesh, pray with the Jesus prayer during the day and at home? How do I get rid of the lust of the flesh? I am tired of it.
– The more people stay in this state, the harder it is to get rid of it. This is natural. Christians resist their sins all life long; this is a long process. Endure yourself and do not fall into despair. And move forward with tiny steps. Pray and trust yourself into the hands of Christ. Appeal to the Holy Theotokos and avoid this problem in your mind.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– Unfortunately, I am now in a state of lukewarmness, laziness, and idleness in my spiritual life. The gravest thing is that I, understanding I am in a sad state, cannot find motivation for improvement. I ask for your prayers and maybe a piece of advice.
– I advise you to visit some holy sites. This may help in your situation.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– Dear Father Sergiy, I would like to ask you about the Jesus prayer. I try to pray with it, but succeed in keeping attention only in my mind. The matter is I had a 16-year experience of Indian meditations before I came to Orthodoxy. I can stop my mind, but I do not know how to switch from my mind to my heart. All my attempts end in my head. I might have done something wrong. Help me, please.
– The main recipe – do not set short-term deadlines for yourself, otherwise, if you fail, you will become upset and have a psychological cramp. You need to simply pray and pray. It is very important to maintain simplicity and gentleness while praying. Do not cramp yourself. This is more important than keeping your attention. If you will learn how not to get upset, to avoid the spasm, when nothing seems to work, it will be a good foundation for your further spiritual work. Everything will come and set itself on this foundation in time.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– Is it necessary to execute the prayer rule of Athos all at once or is it possible to segment it and pronounce some during the day and some at night?
– It is up to you. You should consider your abilities and decide which way is more convenient for you. The main thing is stability.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– Father Sergiy, I ask you to pray for my daughter Maria. She is in Kiev while we are in Donbass. There is a war going on; she can’t leave the city and come to us…
– Yes, of course, I will pray. May Lord help you and your daughter! May He keep you safe!
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– How to make amends for our parents, who are not longer with us?
– Pray for them and give alms. This will be your redemption. Wringing your hands and falling into despair because you have not succeeded in doing something right and in time will not do. Moreover, despair makes us helpless and weakens our hearts. We cannot pray being in despair. We need to keep the peace of our souls, which will help us to pray, while our prayer will help our deceased relatives.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– I live by myself. I am not old yet. I suffer from the sin of masturbation. I confessed and took the Eucharist on Pascha last time at a monastery in some other town. I am a choir-master and people frown because they see that I haven’t received the Eucharist for a long time. Recently, I fought back my shame and went to a confession to a priest who knows me, but he denied me the Eucharist. I sinned again. And I can’t go to him with this sin again. Shame is beyond me. But the main thing is I know for sure I will fall again. What should I do?
– Send me your phone number and I will confess you by phone, when you are ready to do this.
Archpriest Sergiy
– I made my own decision on vaccination. I will not have it. What can you say about QR-codes? As far as I know, only Porphyrios, Bishop of Solovki, declared against the vaccination and QR-codes. The rest of the people remain silent; they either support this or are afraid of raising their voice…
– I do not give comments on these issues.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov.
What should I do?
– I have been at a monastery for 9 years. Monasticism has been life filled with the highest purpose for me. I was tonsured as a nun only two years ago. Half a year ago my parents were taken ill with covid and both of them had to have critical care at an emergency department. I took this very hard and prayed hard, and the Lord kept them alive. Right after my mom got better at the emergency, I fell gravely ill. The illness has had a grave impact on my nervous system, and I began to fear everything.
At first I tried to be strong and said to myself: it’s ok, the Lord is with me. But then new troubles appeared, and my hope started disappearing. I began hesitating about faith, having demonic fear and panic attacks. During my illness at the hospital, I almost did not sleep and prayed a lot for everyone who was sick with covid (though it is bad that I had not taken a blessing for that). I also said in the heat of the moment that it would have been better if I had fallen ill instead of my mother. When our shchemanun, who had poor health, fell ill, I was accused of infecting her. And I, in agitation, said to her, “Let me have this condition instead of you.”
In the end, I overstrained myself through my unreasonable zeal and I cannot come out of depression for 4 months stillalready. The most frightening thing is that I feel bad at church. It seems that everything is pushing on me at the monastery. I try to receive the Eucharist more often, but I feel worse from it and I am oppressed by the monotony of prayers at church. I cannot imagine myself without a monastery, but I feel some spiritual damage inside. What should I do? Please, give me a piece of advice.
Nun Antonia
– This is not the only case when people have such consequences after covid. I think you need to have a vacation in order to recover psychologically. It is a necessary step after the hospital. If you will simply fight against all this, you will overstrain and break yourself. Come to visit us, if they will let you at your monastery.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov
– I am a third-year student of the Biology faculty in Saint Petersburg. I wish to go into a monastery. Pray for me, please. I feel confused about this, but I do not want to live according to my will and self-indulgence any more. It is easy to fall back into the world for me. Is it the will of God for me to leave the studies and enter a monastery?
– You should better complete your education. Then, you may consider a monastery.
Archpriest Sergiy Baranov